New Moon MY VERSION!
by Pinky57
Summary: What if Bella came to the Cullen house a few months after the Cullens left? What if one of the Cullens decide to stay in Forks. This is purely a E/B story.
1. Leaving & Staying and vice versa

**Chapter 1: Leaving and Staying **

_"If you wanna be given everything, give everything up."_

**Jasper:**

"Alice, Jasper. Come on, it's time to go." Esme called out. I heard and felt the sadness in her voice. Ever since, Edward said goodbye to Bella just yesterday, the entire family had been sad, mad and Rose was the only one that didn't find it that way, she was as selfish and uncaring as always. Alice swiftly ran to the front living room and I Slowly walked behind her. We had already loaded the cars and we were ready to leave, Edward was in his Volvo, alone. I could feel the depression and anger and self hatred and about 20 more emotions welling up in him. Rose and Emmett had left last night, they were going to Italy, for their bizzillionith honeymoon. I think that Emmett just didn't want to be here when everything was so doom and gloom. Carlisle and Esme were waiting for us on the front porch. Alice waited for me at the foot of the stairs with a pout on her face, and we walked hand in hand to the door, Esme sadly smiled at us and we walked out of the door, not bothering to lock it and Edward spun his tires as he suddenly left. He knew where we were going in Alaska, but I highly doubted that's where he was going. Apparently Esme and Carlisle caught this as well, both of their emotions went to confusion and doubt.

"Where's he going?" Carlisle asked.

"I don't know, I'm only getting flashes. There are so many unmade decisions. He doesn't know himself."

"Well, we must let him do what he thinks is best. If he wants to be alone, let him. He will get through this." Carlisle said. "I hope." he added sadly.

"That's the thing Carlisle, I don't know where he is going, but I see him alone and moping wherever he is, he has a picture of her with him."

"Well, I don't know Alice, but we must leave." Esme said, wrapping her arms around Alice's shoulders and Alice waved me forward. But I hesitated. I didn't want to leave. The family was never more like a family than in this house, we were never happier. Edward was never happier and neither was Alice. He had the love we all wanted him to have, and Alice had the sister she'd always wanted. She cared for Rose, but nothing like she cared for Bella. I didn't move. I couldn't. I couldn't just give everything up like that. Give up that happiness, I wasn't ready to leave.

"Jazz?" My beautiful Alice questioned.

"I'm going to stay for a little while, I'm not quite ready to leave this behind me yet."

"Are you sure?" Carlisle asked me.

"Yes. I know where we're going and the Jeep is still here."

"Do you want me to stay with you?" Alice questioned.

"No, I'll be okay. Thanks." I said. I pulled her in for a tight hug and gave her a peck on the lips.

"I'll be waiting for you." Alice said with a smile on her face, but her thoughts were still sad that Bella was gone.

"I hope so." I said as she left.

A couple of months passed, It's now December, roughly four months since the catastrophic event that was Bella's 18th birthday party. The very thing that cause Edward to make this drastic decision to leave Bella. I still hated myself for making this a reality. That I couldn't control myself for a second to run out the door before I did anything stupid, but being me, I went for the stupid. It was the easiest thing to do. I didn't even think about trying not to lose it. Alice and Edward had stayed with her, until Carlisle sent Edward to go look for me. Ugh! Way to go Jasper.

It's now noon, on December, 14. Out of the foggy-Forks sky, I heard the familiar grumble of an engine. An Engine that belonged to a '53 Red Chevy. An ancient truck owned by my brother's love. I made the sudden decision to try to fix his mistake. I heard the tires hit the gravel from the pavement and heard the sound get closer and closer to the house. Then I heard her shift the truck into park and turn the engine off. She opened her door and just sat on the seat, her body towards the house. She just sat there, sighed and turned her body back into the cab of the truck and turned on the ignition, I could sense that she didn't have the courage to come in the house, so I decided to give her a little help and sent her courage. They must have worked because she opened the door to her prehistoric truck and got out and looked down, shook her head and walked toward the house ad up the steps and turned the knob before knocking, probably knowing that there was no use to locking it since my family and Bella knew where we lived. She walked into the living room, I could hear her steps as she just walked through, not expecting anybody, the courage I was sending to her was no longer of any use, she was quietly sobbing. I cringed when I felt her. She felt abandoned, betrayed, self-pitiful, but she was trying to be strong. I had to give her credit for that, no matter what happened, Bella was the type to try to be strong, whether it was for her or someone else.

I then heard her walk up the stairs, she went to the third and final floor. I knew exactly where she was going, up to Edward's room. I heard her suck in a deep breath and open the door. I heard her gasp. In the process of deciding to leave Bella, he had trashed his room. He brought down the shelves, and while Alice had packed his CD's he had gotten ahold of his Debussy Album and shredded it to pieces, because It'd held the track of Claire De lune. It was a special song to him, because that sparked their common interests while she was riding in his car after fainting because of the scent of blood. I thought that this would be a good time to make my presence known.

"He did this while deciding whether to leave or stay."

"Jasper?" She asked, turning on a dime. "Jasper? is that really you?" She asked me, shocked.

"Yes, Bella. It's me."

She came up to hug me. It was a good thing that I had just hunted. She let me go.

"What in the world did he do?"

"He wanted to stay, but Rosalie changed his mind, saying that no matter what we did if we stayed, you would be in danger, Edward even made the suggestion of staying here with you, while everyone else left. He says that Carlisle is supposed to be ten years older than he looks, and people are starting to notice. Truth be told, it was time for us to leave, but I stayed. I stayed because, in this house, our family has never felt more together, and you were the glue, whether Rose likes it or not. Bella you tied us together, by ironically bringing our brother back to life. You brought him back into the world."

She was crying at this point. "So he didn't want to leave?"

"No. Silly Bella. You should've seen him when he left. He was so depressed and mad, he wanted so badly to stay, but you know how he is about decisions. Once he is set on something there is no alternative. Or sometimes, when he has decided something, he goes to that head on, but he can also be turned the other way around, when he hurts someone. He's very fickle." I smiled, and so did she. I tried to relieve some of her stress by bashing my brother, it's a very good thing that he's not here, he'd have my head. Literally, and someone would have to put it back on.

"So if he didn't want to leave why did he?" Bella asked me.

"Bella, he loves you more than you can possibly imagine. I hate to admit it, but what you and Edward have is stronger than any mate relationship. It terrifies him to be away from you, I bet you he is in Hell without you. He left because he took Rose's advice to the extreme, he thought that if you were away from him that you'd be safe and away from any danger and he thought that you'd be better without him. He didn't want to see your soul be damned into eternity. He wants you to have a shot at a normal, human life." I told her.

"That's ridiculous! I know what he believes, but I don't believe it. If he didn't have a soul, then he would've taken me on that first dat of school." She looked around his room, to where the picture of the two of them would be, all that was left was the empty frame. "He took the picture with him." She said, getting off the couch and picking up the empty frame and began stroking it. "Where exactly is he?" She asked, tears running down her face.

"I don't know. No one does, not even Alice, he doesn't check in but every few weeks. If that. "

"Can you take me to them? I'm not expecting anything, I just really miss them."

"I don't know Bella." Just then my phone buzzed in my pocket. It said ALICE on the display and I immediately answered it.

"Hey Jazz, why do I see you and Bella here in Alaska, just curious."

"Because she came here and just asked me to take her to Alaska, and I'm fixing Edward's mistake."

"WHAT? Bring her on, what are you waiting for?" She shrieked loudly.

"Alice, calm down, someone will hear you!"

"No they won't silly. I'm hunting." I could almost see her throwing quotes in the air with her fingers at the word hunting.

"Do you want to talk to her?" I asked her. I saw Bella throw me a nod and a smile. "Of Course! Are you crazy, can I have whatever crack you're smoking?" I laughed.

"Alice, I'm not crazy but you were at one point in time." I joked with her.

"Jasper Hale! Let me talk to her!" She yelled, after giggling.

I took the phone away from my ear and handed it to Bella. She looked at me like 'what can I expect?'

"Careful, she's pretty hyper." I warned her. She nodded and put the phone to her ear, just to take it off.

"BELLA!" I heard Alice scream. "Oh my god!"

"Alice, what are you doing? Trying to burst my ear drum?" She joked affectionally.

"So how are you?" Alice asked.

"I'm good, Now that I'm talking to you guys. How are you?"

"Good, but if he knows that I talked to you, I won't be for long. Oh well! We all miss you Bella." She said, cheerfully.

"He's not even there, how could he know? And I miss you too Alice. I miss everyone." They were talking about Edward, since he said that she was not supposed to watch over her or contact her, She had a great deal of trouble with it, seeing as how Bella was Alice's sister and she knew about her all along. She knew before Edward even knew.

"Alice, have you seen him? Do you have any clue as to where he is?"

"No, Sorry Bella. I see him going back to Forks, I see him staying away, I see him going and coming straight back. The guy is fighting with himself. I don't know where he is though. He doesn't know what to do." Alice told her sadly. "Alright, Bella. I have to go, The family will start worrying, I was only supposed to be on a quick hunt, until I saw you and Jasper in Alaska."

"Okay, bye Alice. See you later?"

"Of course, Silly girl!"

"I'll let you talk to Jasper."

"See you soon." Alice said as she passed the phone to me.

"Hey, Alice. Could you call Charlie and ask him if Bella could stay with us for a few days? We don't want to panic him like last year. Tell him that we couldn't let her visit or talk to her because we were still moving. Or something to that extent." I told her.

"Will do. He'll say yes, so let Bella go back to her house pack her things and get on the road. Love you, jasper."

"Love ya too, hun." I told her.

"Are you ready Bella?"

"I guess." She said shakily.

"Why are you so nervous and jumpy." I asked her, kind of confused.

"'cause I don't know what to expect." She told me truthfully.

"I guess that's understandable." I said as we left the house and she got in her truck and left. I got in Em's jeep and followed her. Luckily Chief Swan was at work.

My phone buzzed again, it was Alice again.

"The Chief said yes, so c'mon!"

"Thanks, is there anything I should know about the trip?" I asked her.

"Nope, no construction and you won't get pulled over." She told me. "It won't take that long."

"Thank you, we'll se you in a bit." I told her.

She squealed delightedly.

"Can't wait, see you! Say hi to Bella for me!"

"Will do."

"Alice said to tell you 'hi'" I said to Bella.

"I just talked to her, not an hour ago." She said while shaking her head and laughing.

"Alright, get your things I'll be here." I said as she ran up the steps and surprisingly didn't fall. I had never been inside the Swan residence. It was a perfect match to Charlie Swan's personality and looked like the bachelor pad of a cop in a small town like Forks in about 25-30 minutes Bella came back down, with a bag on her shoulder. We walked to the Jeep and got in. It was only a few hour drive.

Tell me what you guys think, keep on truckin' or do you EVEN like where this is headed. Let me know. I won't eat you I promise. I'll give you a invisible cookie. :)


	2. Chapter 2: Pain

**Chapter 1.5: Pain**

"_What man does not understand, he fears; and what he fears, he tends to destroy." _

-Unknown

**Edward: **

_FLASHBACK_

_After the birthday party, I went up to my room and I couldn't decide to leave or stay. I wanted to stay so badly, and yet I wanted her to have a happy, normal human life, free of any danger that would be linked to us. Could I, Could I leave her, when it would most likely cause each of us to self-destruct. I don't think I could take it, being without her, but I guess I had to. I had to. No, I didn't, I could very well stay and pretend like nothing happened, but something did happen. I got up off my couch, frustrated, and starting pacing the floor. What are you telling yourself Edward, you don't want to leave. You need her. Damnit! But you want her to be safe, which would never happen when you're still here. I should not be here in the first place, I should be dead, rotted away six feet below the surface. I heard Alice as she was telling me that she was coming in. _

_ "Before you do what you're going to do, let me do this." She said as she flew around my room and got all my CD's and put them into a box. I snagged the Debussy Album from her. _

_ "So you've seen it?"_

_ "Seen what?" She asked as she closed the door behind her. I suddenly grew more furious and threw my massive shelves down, causing a loud crash to be heard throughout the house. I saw the Debussy album in my hands and crushed it. If I kept it, it would remind me of her. I calmed down immediately when Esme knocked on my door._

_ "Hey," She said, walking in._

_ "I can't do it Esme...but I have to." _

_ "You will do whatever you think is best, dear. And remember, whatever your decision is, we will back you all the way." _

_ "We must leave. We have to go." I told her. Looking into her warm, loving eyes. _

"No." That one word caused everything that's been building up in the last year to come tumbling down. The memory haunted me, even though it happened not hours ago. The look on her beautiful face implied that she actually believed me. I thought that I would have to lie through my teeth to make her believe me. I can't believe it.

The family was all packed and ready to go. I couldn't stand it any longer, if I delayed leaving any longer I might stay. I had already told Bella goodbye, so there was no point. Even if I were to get on my knees and grovel for her to forget that any of that was all a dream, that it never really happened, what person would accept it? What kind of sick twisted person would do that to someone? What kind of person would play with someone like that? Oh, yeah. Me. I'm a monster.

As I saw Alice and Jasper and Esme and Carlisle on the porch, I suddenly pushed the accelerator the the floor and the tires squealed as I sharply peeled onto the driveway. I had no idea where I was going, I just know if I don't leave now, I would never go. I pushed the Volvo as hard as it would go on the highway. Leaving the memory of the girl that had tied me to this world. As I made my way, wherever my car was taking me, I yearned to go in the opposite direction. I kept my eyes on the road, until I finally pulled over to the shoulder and took a deep breath although it was not necessary. I looked at myself in the mirror, and didn't like what I saw. Big surprise there! At least being with Bella made me feel like less of a monster. I wanted so desperately to go back to that foggy town of Forks, that had become home, and be with the girl that had stolen my dead, cold, un-beating heart, but I couldn't. I had caused enough damage.

I wanted to get away. To just go. I got back on the highway. I went to the Seattle airport. I saw the flight board and picked Brazil, it was loading in a little less than an hour. I went up to one of the ladies selling tickets and smiled at her, even though it was a forced one.

_Oh my, look at this. He looks so sad. I wonder what happened, did he break up with his girlfriend or something. Oh god, I hope so, Oh, Karen, what are you saying. He just looks so sad. _"Hello, can I help you?" She asked me.

"Yes, I want a one way flight to Rio." I told her, handing her my passport and other credentials.

_ He doesn't look like the business-guy type so it's not business, he just looks defeated. I bet he's running from something. _I had to give it to this girl, she was observant. I thought to myself and she stamped my passport and handed it back to me.

"Thank you and have a nice flight." She told me warmly, obviously trying to cheer me up, which came of no use. I just nodded to her, I couldn't bring it to myself to smile. I just ducked my head and walked to the gate. I looked around while I sat down, watching other gates. Watching people return to their loved ones. I made myself look away. I couldn't stand to look at it. I then suddenly found myself thinking about what would have happened if Bella had been at the airport with Alice and Jasper when we came to Phoenix. I ended the thought as swiftly as I started it. If I was going to get through this, I couldn't bare to think of her. Even though I had a picture of the two of us in my shirt pocket. I didn't have the strength to throw it away. I just sat in the gate, waiting for the flight to board, and not soon enough, it did. I got a first class ticket and the seat next to me, so I wouldn't have to deal with anyone. I sat down in my seat and tuned out all of the voices in my head and pretended to fall asleep until our layover. Then I headed to the new gate and we boarded again and I pretended to fall asleep on that flight as well and then after I left the airport, it was one in the morning so no one was out, so I began to run, run faster than I had ever before. Running from the past and not looking forward to the future.


	3. Chapter 3: BELLA

**Chapter 2: Home**

"_We can't direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails."_

- Bertha Calloway

**Jasper:**

We got in the Jeep, and Bella was talking to me, and telling me all kinds of things about her. Then after a couple of hours, she fell silent, she was deep in thought. I could tell it by the wrinkle in her forehead.

"Bella, what are you thinking about?" I asked her.

"I was just thinking." She said.

"About?" I asked

"What was he like?" She started. "Before we met."

"He was much like he is now, in personality, but you made him more extroverted, more involved in the world. He's not afraid of letting people into his life. You made a little bit more of a optimist out of him. He thought he was satisfied being by himself, he was never looking for anybody, but he certainly found you. He went to Alaska when he first met you, because he was scared. He was scared of the way you made him feel. He made the excuse of your scent, but we all knew otherwise. He hated himself so much that he thought that he was bringing you down with him. He had nothing else so everything was dedicated to you."

"He went to your house every night since he had come back from Alaska. He finally admitted to himself that this could work, he wanted it to and by some miracle you wanted it to work too. He also left because Alice saw you become one of us."

"I knew that though, In Phoenix, I heard her say it."

"Still, it doesn't change anything, Bella. He loves you, but he doesn't want you to become one of us if he can help it. Hate to burst his bubble, but if Alice says it's going to happen, then it's going to happen, if nothing changes." I told her. We had stopped a few times to let her stretch her legs and eat and go to the restroom. We were nearly there, just under 30 minutes.

"So, how have you been, since they left? I'm sorry I never did ask you." She told me.

"You have nothing to be sorry about. I am good, better now that I'm going to fix this, but Bella before we get there in about 30 minutes, you have to know that I can't promise you anything. But you don't have to worry about Rose, her and Emmett are in Italy. Everyone else should be home, Carlisle got a job working nightshift at the hospital and is on call during days."

"We have 30 minutes?" She asked. "Do they know I'm coming."

"No one but Alice. And know we have about 20 minutes."

"You guys drive like maniacs."

"Sorry." I told her, smiling. I am really surprised, I could handle her in the passenger seat right next to me. But the catastrophic event of her birthday made me take control. To ignore her scent.

We then pulled into the driveway, the scenery was much like Forks, lots of trees and snow. Bella took in a deep breath as we weaved through the driveway. The house was the same as when we lived here before. Alice was sitting on the steps and as soon as I put the car in park, she flew to the passenger side door and picked her up and spun her around in circles.

"Bella! Bella! Bella!" Alice chanted again and again, still squeezing her.

I heard Esme in the kitchen. "Did Alice just say Bella? I hear a heartbeat. It can't be!" She said. I saw her in the window. "Carlisle!" She yelled. I heard a book close in Carlisle's study and heard him run to Esme.

"Thanks Jasper." Bella told me.

I ran inside to the kitchen where Esme and Carlisle were. He was standing behind her with his hands on her shoulders.

"Your eyes are NOT lying, she is down there." I told them as they ran downstairs and I went to hunt.

**Esme:**

We had been at the new house for a total of three months. Jasper has still not arrived and Alice is bouncing off the walls, she still hasn't seen when he would return, just that he would.

"Honey, he will be back when he's ready. We won't lose him, Alice. He loves you to dearly." I had told her.

"Yeah, just look at Bella and Edward, they loved each other dearly, but that idiotic brother of mine still left her!" She replied and I cringed at the sound of both of their names. She was dry sobbing as she ran out the door I feel so bad for the both of them. Edward was so sad, and as his mother, it made me sad to see him that way. And Bella, we haven't seen her or talked to her in months after we gave her the cold shoulder, Edward wouldn't let us say goodbye to her. A mother shouldn't have to go through these things. I guess it comes with the territory, being the mother of people who can live forever. Edward never wanted to leave, he begged me for other alternatives. I didn't have any. I told him that he needed to do what was right and best. I couldn't tell him otherwise, it wasn't my choice to make. But if I were the one making it, I wouldn't have had the courage to do what Edward did, I don't think that if Carlisle were human and I loved him as much as Edward loved Bella, I don't think that I could find the strength and self-scarification in me to leave.

In these three months, I haven't heard from Edward. I didn't have a clue as to where he was and neither did Alice. I was worried about him, but I knew that this was something that even his family couldn't help him with. The day of Bella's birthday party was the catalyst, he had been wanting to keep Bella safe and wanted to leave her before the party, but couldn't. He had no reason, and sadly enough, Jasper was the reason. Jasper gave the reason Edward was looking for, the excuse, the exit door he wanted. Emmett and Rose were gone again, on yet another honeymoon. Carlisle was at the hospital working, at night and sometimes during the day, so it was just Alice and me here. It's lonely without everyone. No Emmett and Edward and Jasper bickering, no piano in the background, no arguments, it's eerily quiet. Too quiet for my liking.

It's a typical snowy Friday in Anchorage. Alice went out for a quick hunt and I was in the house by myself, Carlisle was called in. About an hour later, Alice came back in the house and she seemed a little bit happier, not that I was unhappy about it, but I was concerned, even when she spoke on the phone to Jasper on the phone, she wasn't this happy.

"Alice, what have you seen?" I asked her.

"Nothing. What makes you think that I did see something, if I did see anything?"

"You seem happier, not that I object, but it's weird." I told her.

Several hours after that Alice goes and sits on the front porch and I hear the familiar engine of the Jeep. Jasper's back. I bet Alice is thrilled! I'm happy that I get one of my son's back. Then I thought I heard a heartbeat. I think I am hearing things.

Then I hear Alice shriek. "Bella! Bella! Bella!" I was in the kitchen.

"Did Alice say Bella. I hear a heartbeat. It can't be!" I said going to the window, sure enough there was Alice holding Bella and spinning her around in circles. "Carlisle!" Jasper came into the house while Alice was still holing Bella. Carlisle had joined me in the kitchen and put his hands on my shoulders.

He seemed happier also. Jasper dashed into the room.

"Your eyes are NOT lying, she is down there." My most recent son told me. He flashed right back downstairs, where I imagined he was going hunting. So Carlisle and I sprinted downstairs and outside.

"Alice, I think that you're going to make Bella go into rigor mortis."

"Of course not, Silly. You're a doctor, you should know that she's not dead." Alice said, finally letting her go.

"Hey, Carlisle, Esme." Bella told us shyly.

"Welcome, sweetheart." I said, pulling her into a tight hug and kissing her head. "I've missed you so much." I then let her go and stayed beside her as Carlisle brought her into his arms.

"Welcome, we're very glad you're here." He told her sincerely.

"Thank you." She told us. Alice was smiling hugely and had a very smug look on her face.

"Alice, is there something you want to tell us?" I asked her, with my eyebrows lifted.

"Er, no." She said, innocently, but with a smidgen of guilt behind it.

"Are you sure?" I asked her.

"Okay, okay. I _might _have seen a 'lil something."

"A little something? Alice, I think that this is a big thing." Carlisle said, smiling.

"Let's get Bella inside." I said, wrapping my arms around her shoulder and guiding her in the house and Alice got her suitcase. She was quietly crying tears of happiness, I would be happy too, if I was reunited with my extended family. Just with her appearance, the house as in a happier mood, but there was only one thing missing, one piece to complete the puzzle, Edward. Oh that boy. I couldn't imagine the pain that he must be going through.

We got Bella situated in Edward's bedroom. We pulled the bed out of the couch and I made her bed for her. Carlisle was called in and Alice went downstairs to call Emmett.

"Hey, guess who we got here!"

"I wish, but it's just as good! It's Bella!"

"Yes, she's actually here! dodo head." I heard her say.

I then heard her run back up the stairs and back into the room where Bella and I were.

"So how have you been, Bella?" I asked her.

"She's been better. She had a rough patch." Alice replied.

"Alice! You weren't supposed to watch." I scolded her.

"I was told not to watch, it's not my fault that see. I'm so attuned to her." She paused. "He made me watch your every move last year, even before he was around you 24/7." She told Bella. Bella just shook her head.

"Alice, have you seen him? Do you know where he is?"

"Seen, yes. Know where he is...No."

"How is he?" She asked her again, I found that it was my time to leave.

**Alice: **

Bella was asking how my brother was, I knew he was suffering and I thought that he deserved it. How could someone leave the one thing that they cared most for? I didn't understand how he was able to just leave. He didn't even let me say goodbye to her. That disappointed me most, not being able to say goodbye to my sister.

"He's all over the place, Bella. He's screwed up alright. He is by himself, that's the only thing that's concrete is the fact that he wants to be alone. The future's to all over the place, he's just...I don't know Bella. I just don't know.." I told her, as she began to cry. "Sh, Bella it's going to be okay. He's fine, he's alive, but the last few times I've seen him, he's had black eyes. I don't think he's hunted in months."

"Have you talked to him?" She asked me.

"Not recently. He only checks in ever so often, and just because he doesn't want Esme to worry so much."

"Esme! Emmett and Rose will be home tomorrow afternoon! They caught a private airline flight out."

"Thanks for telling me, dear." She told me as she stood in the threshold of Edward's room. I got up off the pull out bed.

"Try to get some sleep." I told her.

"I'll try, but I'm not making any promises." She said, tiredly.

"Night, dear." Esme said as she kissed her on the forehead.

"Night guys." She slurred out.

"Jasper. Thanks." I softly called out.

I heard a chuckle and went downstairs to find him on the couch watching TV.

"She needed to sleep. I'd wager she hasn't gotten much the last few months.

"I don't think so either." Esme said sadly.

"I saw flashes of her, she was just really down, but she was only trying for Charlie. It's not like she could go up to him and say, oh yeah dad, by the way the reason I'm so blue is because my vampiric boyfriend broke up with me."

"I don't think that would have worked out too well." Esme testified.

"I think that Charlie would've thrown her in the looney bin."

"Well, let's not dwell on this topic." I said out loud.

"Ok, so who's calling Edward." Jasper said.

"I'll do it." Esme replied.


	4. AN

135 hits just this morning and I just posted it this morning. You guys are awesome, Love the response out of this. I'm writing as much as I can, I'm gonna update ASAP.

THanks for all the reviews/Fav Alerts.


	5. 4: Footy Footy Football

**Chapter 3: Footy Footy Football **

_"Cuando amor no ed locura, no es amor. (When love is not madness, it is not love.)"_

-Danish proverb

**ESME: **

I had the job of telling Edward that Bella was here. I had no clue on how to proceed with this.

"Alice, do you have any advice?" I asked her.

"Nope, sorry." She told me before bounding out with Jasper locking hands. "We're going out for a run. You'll figure it out."

"Thanks, Alice." I told her sarcastically.

"You're welcome." She told me happily, before she and Jasper, dashed out the door. Everything was a little bit easier now that Bella was here, but telling Edward that we broke our word was something that would not be easy. Bella was still upstairs fast asleep and I took this as my opportunity to call Edward. I picked up the phone and dialed his cell number. It rang four times and it went to voicemail. I dialed his number again.

"Come on, Edward, pick up." I was talking to myself. Voicemail a second time. Would the third time be the charm, absolutely.

"Esme?" He asked sharply.

"Edward, I'm so glad I caught you. There's something I need to tell you."

I heard him take in a deep breath. "What's wrong?" He asked. He sounded so upset.

"It's nothing wrong..." I hesitated.

"Esme, what is it?" He grew a little more agitated.

"Son, Bella's here. Jasper stayed behind at Forks and she came to the house and he brought her here."

"Esme. I told you! I thought you promised." He yelled.

"Edward, How am I to turn her down after she shows up here? And Alice saw her here anyway. How could we let her down by refusing her again!" I was furious, how dare he raise his tone at me, after all I told him was that the love of his life was right down the hall.

"Alice also saw..Be- _her _dead in Phoenix. That didn't happen, it didn't give Jasper any right to take to Anchorage!"

"Edward, you can't even say her name. How have you been coping the last few months, away from _her_. Away from Bella. Bella, Bella, Bella." I repeated her name over and over.

"Esme, stop it! Just stop it!"

"I won't stop!" I guess I was yelling so loudly that Bella had woken. She padded toward the study.

"Esme? What's going on? Is everything okay?" I pulled the phone away from my ear and extended it out towards Bella before she got done talking.

"Everything is fine, sweetheart. Go back to bed." I told her.

"Are you sure, you sound awful upset. Whose on the phone?" She asked.

"It's fine, Bella. Go back to bed."

"Okay, see you in the morning." She told me as she padded back to the bedroom.

"She's really there?" He said, more like himself.

"Of course, you think I was lying to you?" I asked him in disbelief.

"No, I was just think you were trying to get me home." He told me honestly. This is the longest time I've talked to him on the phone.

"Did it work?" I asked him. Hopeful.

"Esme, I did enough damage, what more could she possibly want from me?"

"Everything." I told him and hung up the phone. I would give him to think about it.

(A/N: Cliffy right, but i wouldn't do that to you guys.)

**ALICE****: **

Jasper and I returned to the house as soon as Esme hung up the phone. I heard all that she said, and I was proud of my "mom." That conversation was exactly what he needed. If it was up to me, I would tear his arm off...Or worse...I was helping Esme fix Bella's breakfast. We were making her pancakes. I was just fixing to pour the batter into the skillet, but I was suddenly hit with a vision. I saw Edward and Bella, she was asleep in his arms, in his bedroom, here, in Alaska.

I squealed out loud. I put the batter aside and I was bouncing around and I grabbed Esme by the hands and started bounding around in a circle like school girls and she stopped the circle.

She grabbed me by the forearms and looked he dead in the eye, her expression very clear, needing no words.

I smile big and nod. I then dash up to Edward's room where she was still asleep. I saw that she'd wake in a few minutes any-whoo, but I would help her out a little bit. I ran to the bed and jumped on it and was jumping up and down.

"Wake up Bella! Wake up!" I yell, she moans and turns. I then jump one last time and landed on my knees on the bed, making sure not to land on her.

"Come on Bella, wake up. He's coming HOME!" I yell at her. I now had her full attention, she shot out of the bed like a bat out of hell.

"What? When?" She demanded.

"Tomorrow morning, early."

"Well, why are you telling me this now?" She asked, getting out of bed, and made her way to the bathroom.

"Just thought you'd like to know." I replied, stalking off.

**EMMETT: **

"Rose, I don't know what you have against this girl, but don't you want to see Edward? 'Cause you kinda can't see him without her." I told her in this place that we found, who dealt with cargo, but we slipped the guy a tip if he could get us to Alaska.

"I knew that, Em. I'm not ignorant."

"That wasn't was I was saying." I told her, trying to cool her down.

"Then what were you saying, Emmett." She asked me bitterly. I was lucky the pilot didn't know English and that Rose knew Italian.

"I'm saying that no matter how much you hate to admit it, she brought the life into him and this family. She's made him happier than he ever was. You're just mad that you never made him happy and that you lost to an non-average, average human girl." I threw the non-average in there because Bella was, without a doubt, not normal. Heck she spent all of her free time with a buncha vampires. If she wasn't idiotic, she wasn't normal either. We were already in the air at this point.

"The only thing that I'm admitting to is the fact that she made him happy, but can we please get off this subject?" She asked me.

"Sure, thing!" I replied, I didn't feel like getting my butt whipped. Sure, Rose is my wife, but man, oh, man she's got a temper and she's most likely the only person that has scared me.

"Okay, then. Let's just have a peaceful flight." She told me, I wasn't gonna take that long. We just rode out the rest of the ride in comfortable silence. It's about dang time we got home, I was missing the bros. Missed playing football. Hell, I even missed Eddie boy. Without him, I couldn't make fun of anyone. The rest of us were married couples and no fun to mock, but my brother on the other hand, endless entertainment. Literally endless. We rented a car when we got to the airport and drove home. I was looking forward to this. For the first time in a while the family would be together again. I mean I'm not into all the fluffy fluff stuff, but I have to say that I missed everyone. I was looking forward to getting home and I wouldn't have to wait long, we were already in the driveway. I felt like a little kid going to a candy store, not that I would actually know that, but I've seen movies and TV shows. Oh, well. We're home. Esme, Alice and the whole gang were on the porch, awaiting our arrival.

Esme caught me in a tight hug, while Rose was hugged by Alice and Jasper then as Esme released me, she went to Rose and we traded. Carlisle then shook my hand and then Jasper and I shook his hand. Then I saw Bella sitting on the porch steps, with a big grin on her face.

"Looks like someone missed meh." I told her, grabbing her off the step and into a big bear hug.

"Of course! You make everything more entertaining." She told me.

"That's right. I'd better hear something like that." I told her as I set her down. She was still on her feet.

"Rose, I'm glad you're back as well." She told her, she was shocked that Bella had actually spoken to her. Unlike Rose, Bella didn't hold any grudges.

"So, who's up for a game of footy-footy football?" I asked.

"I'm game." Jasper replied.

"You'd better be." I said as I ran to the field with Jasper quick in pursuit.

"I'll grab the ball. And Bella." I heard Alice say. I was the first to the field and I just looked around me, thinking that this couldn't be any better, except that if my mind reading brother was here, he made ball all the more fun.

Alice and Bella arrived not much later than we did and then Rose, Esme and Carlisle not far behind them.

"Alright, boys and girls. I wanna see a fair game, no cheating!" Esme Scolded us.

"Awwww, mom." Jasper complained. I busted out laughing, hearing the echos.

"C'mon, Esme. We don't cheat, we just try really hard to win." I said.

Bella laughed.

"The thought still counts." Esme replied.

"Alright, guys how we gonna break this up?"

"How about, Jasper and Rose are captains, Em and Alice were captains last time.

"Alright!" Jasper screeched.

Bella reached into her pocket and pulled out a quarter.

"Call it." She said.

"Heads." Jasper replied.

It was heads, Alice probably told him, it wasn't fair. Oh well, let's play ball.

Jasper chose Carlisle and Alice, Rose chose me and Esme. Esme didn't really want to play, but she had to the teams weren't even and so she had to, to keep it "fair."

We played for about 2 hours. Jasper and Alice ran to the house first, Rose and I followed and Esme, carrying, Bella, and Carlisle brought up the rear. It was about five in the afternoon, Alice said that Edward wasn't expected until early morning.

Jasper and Alice went up to their room and Esme dropped Bella off at the doorway. Rose and I were on the couch watching the Bears play the steelers and, Carlisle's phone rang.

"I have to go. 9-1-1 from work." He said as he pecked Esme on the lips and took off. Bella went up to Edward's room and I followed her.

"So what have you been up to?" I asked her.

"Oh, nothing much. Just playing the waiting game." She told me.

"I know that silly. I mean before now!" I told her.

"Well, I don't know. I guess I'd been better." She told me. "Do we really have to talk about this?" She asked me.

"Naw, we don't have to, kid." I told her, getting up and heading to the door. "I'll bet he's in Hell without you."

"Thanks, Emmett. Everyone keeps saying that, but I can't understand it. It just doesn't make any sense to me."

"What doesn't?" I asked her.

"It's just that if he didn't want to leave, why did he. I knew from the beginning what could result from being with him. I just don't understand it." She said sadly, and sadly I dodn't have a reply.

"I don't know." I told her as I shut the door behind me.

A/N: Sorry this took so long guys, I started this story over Fall break and school is back, I write whenever I can and as much as I can. I appreciate your patience and the response of this story.

Thanks, Keep the reviews coming!


	6. Chapter 5: Alone

**Chapter 4: Alone **

_"The strongest man in the world is he who stands alone."_

_Hendrick Ibsen _

"_I am as fragile as it it possible to be. I am shredded to the core. I am at the point where I am stripped bare."_

_Rachel Hunter_

**Edward: **

Misery. Misery seems like an understatement. I had gone to Rio and rented a crappy apartment, where the paint was peeling off, the closet door was off it's hinges, there were stains all in the carpet. I didn't care, I was hardly here. I wasn't going to nomadic, roaming from place to place, but I couldn't stay in one place either. I had ran to the mountain, towards the top, and climbed in a tree. I just stayed there as my body shook back and forth, from the dry sobs that racked my frame. I was beginning to lose it more and more each day. I didn't know how much longer I could take this. I could barely stand it. I had left for her benefit, but its causing me so much pain, that I don't think that it was worth it. I MADE myself think that I left for her benefit, but I don't know anymore. I don't know anything anymore. I guess that in the problem of life, two negatives don't always make a positive:

Negative # 1: I brought myself to leave the foggy little town of Forks that had become home. I left the one thing that kept me sane, that made me feel like my existence wasn't pointless. It felt like I was born to love her. I never knew this before, but I'm glad that Carlisle gave me this second chance, without it, I would have never found the thing that held me to the world.

Negative # 2: Uncertainty: If I did make the decision to go back, had I damaged everything beyond repair. If I went back to my family, how would they react when I betrayed them, when I never answer their calls but every so often and hardly ever call them, would they turn their backs on me as I had on them.

Life is surrounded by uncertainly, even more so in a life that lasts forever and never changes.

I was still in the tree, watching the sunset and took out the picture in my front pocket. I ran my forefinger over it and stuck it back in my pocket. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw hers. I would see her beautiful chocolate brown eyes. I imagined the look of forgiveness, but knew I wouldn't find any. All I wanted was to go back and be with her, to get down on my hands and knees and beg and plea for her to forgive and forget. To Forget that I'd even said goodbye to her. God, why did I have to do that? Why would you kill the one thing that made you happy. I was sitting on the branch and my phone starting ringing. "ESME" It said. I took her calls most often, because I didn't want her to worry if there was no need. I was fine, physically, but an emotional wreck. Thank God Jasper wasn't here, I'd feel sorry for him, Hell I feel sorry for myself. I sighed as I pressed the send button to answer the call.

"Esme?" I asked kind sharply, immediately hating myself for taking such a tone towards the woman that had become my moms for all intents and purposes. I loved her dearly, but I wanted to get off the phone as soon as possible to get back to my self-pitying.

"Edward, I'm so glad I caught you." She paused, nervous. "There's something I need to tell you." Surely there wasn't anything wrong, or she wouldn't be so nervous, I didn't know what to think. I just didn't want to think, because every time I did, I would think of her.

I took a deep breath. "What's wrong?" I asked a little more forceful than necessary.

"It's nothing _wrong._" She hesitated, throwing emphasis onto the word wrong, she might not have caught it herself, but I surely did.

"Esme, what is it?" I demanded. Demanded; in all of these years, I have never been this as Emmett would say 'bitchy' or grumpy towards my mother figure.

"Son, Bella's here. Jasper stayed behind at Forks and she came to the house and he brought her here." She told me, spluttering out the words, making them one big long ramble, I could almost see if flinching, as if awaiting a blow.

For a few seconds, it was like she never spoken then it suddenly dawned on me, the promise that they told me they'd keep. "Esme, I told you! I thought you promised!" I growled at her.

"Edward, how am I to turn her down after she shows up here? And Alice saw her here anyway. How could we let her down by refusing her again!" She said, authoritatively.

"Alice also saw Be- _her_," I couldn't bear to say her name. "dead, in Phoenix. That didn't happen, it didn't give Jasper any right to take her to Anchorage!" I yelled at her, I suddenly found myself to be thankful that I was on a mountain top, in a tree, surrounded by no one, ignoring the scents of the wildlife and focusing on making myself miserable in all ways possible.

"Edward, you couldn't even say her name. How have you been coping the last few months, away from _her._ Away from Bella, Bella, Bella, Bella." She recited her name over and over again, causing me to scream internally. If I wouldn't have watched my self, the phone would be a mass of mangled pieces.

"Esme, just stop it! Just stop it!" I yelled when it began to be to much.

"I won't stop!" She screamed back at me.

I heard her move the phone and I heard the voice I'd thought I'd never hear again.

"Esme, what's going on? Is everything okay?" It was my angel. My tether to this world. Her heart beats for the both of us. I could almost hear the sound through the phone, I wish I could.

"Everything is fine, sweetheart. Go back to bed." I heard Esme tell my angel.

"Are you sure, you sound awful upset. Whose on the phone?" Ah, Bella will be Bella, always worrying about other people besides herself.

"It's fine, Bella. Go back to bed." Esme told her.

"Okay, see you in the morning." I heard her say. I almost wanted to scream into the phone, but I didn't. Fool. I remember Emmett watching Mr. T and his famous line: I pity da fool. That's exactly right, I'm a fool.

"She's really there?" I asked her in disbelief.

"Of course, you think I was lying to you?" She asked me, shocked.

"No, I just think that you were trying to get me home." I told her.

"Did it work?" She asked me. Yes, I wanted to reply so badly it hurt, but I knew better.

"Esme, I've done enough damage, what more could she possibly want from me?" I asked her both openly and rhetorically.

"Everything." She told me and hung up. I put the phone back in my pocket. It was now dark. If I left now, I could be back in Alaska in a couple days at the most. I jumped out of the tree and for the first time in a while, I ran for a reason. Not to outrun my memory, not to make myself invisible, I now had everything to gain, and nothing to lose.


	7. Chapter 6: Vision

Chapter 5: Homecoming

A person starts to live when he lives outside himself

Albert Einstein

_(A/N: I would like to just say thank you to all the readers for actually giving this story a shot and for all their fabulous reviews, Favorite listings and Alerts. You don't know how much this all means to me. I just thought that the Cullens should have their say __if this really did happen,__ we already knew how Bella was after the Cullens left in New Moon, but as the title implies, this is my version. The glorious, fabulous, talented and awesome Stephenie Meyer owns all, I'm just a person who is fanatical about Twilight...and Paramore.) _

**ALICE:**

Ever since I had the vision that Edward was coming home, the atmosphere was more relaxed and I didn't need my husband's gift to know that. Esme was humming her favorite that Edward created especially for her, Carlisle was laughing, but mostly due to the immaturity of our lovable brother, Emmett, but laughing none the less. I was floating around more often, dancing around the house more like my happy self. Bella was also more lively, she was up an about more often, even though the lack of sleep was still eating at her, I could tell by the dark rings under her eyes. Even though she had gotten a good night's the two days she had been here, but she was still exhausted, I couldn't blame her. She had gone through enough, due to my lame, dumb brother. He might have been coming home, but he still needs some straightening out, I intend to do just that. Whenever I get the chance I'm going to give him a lil talking to.

It was now 9:00, just a few hours after the football game. Carlisle had gone to work his shift at the hospital. He wasn't as home as often as he was in Forks, more people in Alaska means more people in the hospital which means more doctors needed and less Carlisle around. Rose was adoring herself in the mirror in her bedroom. Bella and Esme were in the kitchen. Esme was fixing Bella dinner, but Bella was her assistant chef. Emmett and Jasper were playing Halo. I ran in the living room and turned off the Xbox.

"Hey!" Emmett complained.

"Don't whine, we're watching movies 'Til Edward gets here." I replied.

"Fine. And I'm just playing nice cause he's on his way."

"Okay then."

"Bella!" I called.

She walked into the living room. "What's up?"

"We are watching movies, and I won't take no for an answer." I replied.

"Okay. Its not like I was going to object." She told me.

"Good." I told her as I dashed to her side and grabbed her arm and pulled her to farther into the living room. I didn't bother making Rose come down here, she would most likely just ruin the moment.

"Go ahead and sit down, Bella. I've got things covered in here." Esme said.

"You sure?" Bella asked her.

I grabbed her waist and drug her to the couch. "Of course she is silly, she wouldn't have said it if she didn't mean it." I said as she sat down on the couch.

"SO...what are we watching?" Emmett asked.

"Errr...how about Underworld 2: Evolution?" I said.

Emmett and Jasper just scoffed. "Seriously?" They asked at the same time.

"Why not?" I asked, rhetorically.

"Alright, Alright." Emmett said as Esme came in with Bella's food. Smelled revolting, even for people food. Esme sat next to Bella on the couch and I started the movie.

We were all quiet for the first few minutes of the movie, until they were talking about Michael, the hybrid of half vampire and half werewolf.

"Can that really happen?" Bella asked. "Is there even such a thing as werewolves?"

"Can I take your plate?" Esme asked, clearly as a diversion.

"Sure. Thanks." She replied.

"So?" Bella asked.

"Err, we think so, but no one knows for sure." I asked, trying to find a way to beat around the bush, I didn't want to have to tell her that the La Push kids are descendants of men who could transform into large wolves, but that hardly counted as a true werewolf.

"Ah." She said.

We were now at the part where Selene and Michael are caught in the truck when the sun is rising, unlike us, these vampires actually fried in the sun.

"HA! Like that would ever happen!" Emmett replied.

"I know right! Whoever wrote this movie is ignorant." Jasper replied.

"Boys. Just watch the movie." Esme said.

"I thinks it's kind of interesting to see all the different views of vampires people have." Bella said, surprisingly.

"Hmm, good point Bella." Esme replied.

"You all don't Bleed." Bella said when the part where Selene goes to talk to the traitor guy, Tenus and he's partying and one of his lovers bites him.

The next several scenes were watched in silence. Then the big battle scene was on and whenever Michael stuck his hand through the werewolf's head, Bella Cringed. We are now to the end of the movie, killing William and Marcus, Selene ended Vampires and Werewolves, they were people again.

"That could so not happen." Emmett said.

"Totally." Bella replied.

"Alright, that was one hour and forty two minutes down, what else are we watching?" I asked.

"Whatever you want to." Esme replied.

"How about pretty woman?"

"The chick flick?" Emmett complained.

"Oh, come on Emmett, be a man about it." I replied, joking.

"Only because you're my sister. Gosh, how can someone so small be so annoying!"

"It's a talent!" I replied. Thinking back to the time that Edward and I had the same conversation, again, and again. I couldn't wait for him to come back. Thinking of him triggered my next vision.

I saw him arrive and go straight to Bella, who was asleep in his bedroom.

"Guys, when he gets here, don't bother to try to talk to him. He'll go straight to Bella." I said in a whisper so that Bella couldn't hear.

I put in Pretty Woman, I love this movie. Shopping on Rodeo Drive, was one of the most awesomest experiences ever.

About halfway though the movie, I heard Bella's heartbeat slow and her breaths were shallow and even. She'd fallen asleep. She was so out of it that she wasn't talking.

"Emmett?" I said. He knew exactly what I meant. He gingerly picked her up and took her upstairs. I followed him and changed her into her pajamas.

We finished the movie and right after the end credits, I heard the sound of the Volvo. Edward! Edward had finally come home! YAY! Esme wore a big smile on her face and Emmett was grinning ear to ear.

"How is he?" Esme asked Jasper.

"He's mixed up. He's determined, agonized, self-destructive, guilty, grateful. I tell ya, he's emo." Esme looked serious and nodded. He flashed in the house and just paused, and ran upstairs.

_( A/N: See, I haven't eaten you yet. Loving LOVING all the reviews and update alerts, this chapter wasn't as good as the rest, but at least it's something. I just loved the fact of them watching Underworld, i don't know why, though. I just find the idea hilarious and ridiculous. Oh well, I don't know what's next...Edward's journey home maybe . Comments/concerns/criticism is always welcome. PEACE OUT! xoxo. _

_PS: And for some reason, I imagine Edward more anguished than I wrote him, I feel sorry for him in New Moon...cough cough...write New Moon in EPOV, Stephenie..cough cough. =P)_


	8. Chapter 8: Homecoming

Chapter 6: Homecoming 

_ "__You tried your best and you failed miserably, the lesson is don't try."_

_Homer simpson _

EPOV

I ran to the small, pathetic "airport," careful not to be seen and got a ticket to Seattle, where my car was still parked. It was going to be a long night. I went and sit down, but couldn't find myself able to remain sitting down. I got up and paced. I was fine with pacing there in that tiny little space for hours, but I had a charade to maintain, a human one. I wasn't about to cause confusion as how one person can walk for a very long time.. I went back to my dingy, creaky chair and forced myself to sit there. I was gripping the bottom of the chair to keep my unforgivable backside in that chair. I was gripping it so tightly that the metal chair gave in, indenting my hold into the metal. I quickly looked around and saw that there was no one was in the same area as me, but there were clerks working and people at the other places. It is now three o'clock in the morning, and my flight departed at 3:45. Just forty five minutes until I could board that plane. The plane that is one step closer to what I wanted to happen. I wanted Bella to act like nothing happened, but I didn't deserve any sympathy from her, or forgiveness. I didn't even deserve her. How could a monster like me possibly deserve something as special as she is; and for that, I had no answer.

I didn't bring any luggage with me, just my ID and passport which was in my wallet. I got checked at the gate and went to the 1st Class cabin, I had bought my seat and the seat next to me so I wouldn't have to deal with anyone beside me. They would probably think that I was losing my mind, and that, is a great possibility. I didn't even know how I could ever say goodbye to Bella to begin with. I hadn't thought the decision through, Alice and Esme always scolded me for overreaction and this time, I had to hand it to them. I have a habit of overreacting when it comes to Bella, she is the only thing in the world. She has been the one thing that made me feel alive-made me feel anything. I had nothing else. I had Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Emmett, Jasper and Rose, but there are gaps that sometimes a family can't fill. I didn't know what those gaps felt like until I left the foggy little town of Forks that the girl I loved inhabited. After I left her , it felt like I was being torn apart at the inside, feeling like I had been shot clean through with a shotgun and left me riddled with holes. It was misery. Now I just have to see if I am going to be given the forgiveness I know I had not earned, but yearned for. All I wanted was to hold in her my arms, to hear the heartbeat that was a sign of our love, and a sign of her life and mine.

The thought of her heart made me thirsty, I had not hunted in four months I had been in Rio. I wanted to punish myself in as many ways as possible, but it made me think. I had not had her around me. Would her scent be as destructive as that first day at Forks High School? Would I be able to refuse? I silently growled at myself- Shut up! You can resist, stop dwelling on the negative and focus on the positive. I can almost hear Alice's voice, shouting back at me: Yeah, right like that'll ever happen. Once a pessimist, always a pessimist. We landed at our layover in Nashville and waited a little while and boarded the next flight, a direct flight to Seattle. I took in a deep breath, ignoring the slightest burn of my throat and sat in my seat. I knew that Alice had already seen me coming back. I had known she'd been watching me, from all the panic and the trepidation in her voice in the voicemails she left me.

"Edward, be safe." She told me in the first call. I never called her back.

"Edward- look I know you're not happy, but come home, Esme and Carlisle are worried sick! They have no idea about you. You need to call" She said, still calm, about the 45th call. I never called her back.

"Edward, come on! Pick up the phone. Come home, we all miss you!" She said, her voice getting a little more agitated with call number 60th call. I never called her back.

"Edward- Damnit!" She said, and hung up after those two words, with call number 165. All this time and I had never called me back. And after this call, she no longer called me.

Of the 175 calls over the last few months, Alice was 165 of them. Esme called five times, Carlisle six, Emmett 3 and Jasper 2. Rose never called me, and I really didn't want her to. All she would have done is rub it in my face. I could see her whipping her hair and saying: I Told you so, Edward, but do you listen to me. No. Instead you just had to go and fall in love with a human, expose us and put us in danger. I told you not to do this, but you did it anyway, all for this merely pathetic human girl!

I just stared out the window, refusing food from the flight attendants and finally, after almost a day in the air and in airports, I ran to the long term parking of the Seattle airport and got the keys to the Volvo out of my pocket and unlocked it. I climbed in and smiled. I missed my car. The car still held the faintest scent of Bella, I picked up on it right on the spot. I wouldn't miss that scent, ever. It scent my throat into a blaze, but I quickly overcame it and turned the ignition and started the car, it purred to life like it hadn't been sitting here for months. I would have to go to a gas station before I would make the journey to Anchorage. Everything that I had packed was still in the car, so I decided it was time to change clothes and clean up a little bit. When I arrived at the gas station, I bought the gas with my credit card and went inside to change clothes. I changed into a plain gray T-shirt and Black jeans and black tennis shoes, i brushed out my hair and went back out to the car, after being wished a good day from the register operator whose thoughts about me were leading to inappropriate places.. It was about one in the afternoon and I wouldn't most likely get to Anchorage until early tomorrow morning, I turned onto the road and made my way the the place I was supposed to be. Home.


	9. Chapter 9: Here and Gone Again

**Chapter 7: Here and Gone Again **

_(A/N: I know this is a sudden shift into Bella's POV, but I just wanted her to have her say when Edward comes back. ¡Adios! xoxo) _

_"Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love."_

_George Eliot_

BELLA POV

I had fallen asleep while Alice made us watch Pretty Woman. Edward was due back early tomorrow morning. I was going to try to stay up the entire time but I didn't make it, despite the light when it was still dark. In Alaska, there is no night. Well there is, but it's light outside, which makes no sense to me. I slept dreamlessly even knowing what was happening any moment know.

I'd guessed that I had been asleep for about five hours when I felt a huge thing of light bust through the threshold. I woke up with the added light and rubbed my eyes, just thinking it was Esme or Alice checking up on me. After my eyes adjusted, I knew exactly who it was. He hadn't changed. His hair, still bronze and unkept was going every which way and he was just standing there. I jumped out of the bed like I had just been stuck in the butt with a branding iron and ran to him and throw myself at him. I feel him stiffen against me and I saw that his eyes were black, he must have been thirsty. I quickly unwind my arms around him.

"I'm sorry." I told him, going to the bed.

"Bella, what on Earth do you have to be sorry for?" He asked me. "If anyone here should do any apologizing, it's me." He said, lowering his head, ashamed. I went to go sit on the bed and he followed, but kept his distance. I sat against the headboard and he sat at the foot of the bed. I scoot over towards him, knowing that he'd never hurt me. He might not know that himself, but he never could hurt me physically, so I never thought that he could. I was so close that I could trace the bruises underneath his eyes. There were a deep purple.

"You look so thirsty." I told him, still tracing the rings. "I've never seen you like this.." I said, drawing my hand back into my lap.

"And you look tired." He told me, I had to hold back a snort. His need was far more important than mine. I wouldn't suffer from a lack of sleep, but I knew that every second that he went without hunting caused him pain.

He started talking again. "Bella, I'm so sorry. Words can't even express how sorry I am. I can't even begin to explain-"

"Shh." I interrupted him. "Don't begin to do this, I know its within your nature to take everything to the extreme. You just wanted to keep me safe. I remember in Phoenix you told me that you'd only leave if it was what was best for me, and because you loved me and keep me safe. But now you HAVE to leave." He had kept his jaw tight and clenched, only breathing when he had to to keep talking.

"And you need sleep." He said, and I shook my head. He would not be getting out of this one.

"Not as badly as you need to hunt. I've never seen you this thirsty. Go before you have even the slightest chance of slipping up." I wish I could take the words back as soon as I said them, but he needed to go. I felt horrible for even placing the seed of doubt into the air.

"Bella, you know I would never." He told me, his eyes gazing at my own. The time apart had not made my heart immune to him.

"I know, but you don't." If I said what I had before, I might as well keep up the charade. "You tell yourself this, I know you WERE desensitized, but that's my point. You were. I smell exactly the same as the first day of school and you haven't hunted in so long. I know you are in pain. You will basically have to start the desensitization process all over again." I said, looking down.

"I'm not leaving." He said firmly. I felt horrible that this was our conversation we were having when he had just come back, but he had to go. There was no question about that.

"OH, yes you are." I told him. "Emmett, Jasper?" I said.

They were both in the room in less than a second. "You rang?" Emmett asked, sounding like Lurch from the Addams family.

"Take him hunting and don't let him give you any lip." I said to them. "Don't come back until you are 100, no, 200% percent satisfied." I said to Edward.

He just looked at me.

"I won't go anywhere. Everyone will be here, unless they need to hunt as well." I said, then I saw Alice appear in room.

"No one else needs to go, it's a boys night out and a girls night in." Alice said. I smiled.

"YEAH!" Emmett boasted. As he, Jasper and Emmett left.

It was just Alice, Esme, Rose and me at the house. Alice had grabbed me and ran me downstairs. Esme met us at the staircase and took me out of Alice's arms.

"Bella. I'm so glad that you made him go. Jasper told me he was thirsty and I was worried...Not for you dear. I know he would never hurt you." She told me as she set back down.

"That's exactly how I made him go. I feel so guilty and ashamed. I can't believe I actually said that he might slip up, even when I know deep down inside that he would hurt himself before he'd ever hurt me." I told her. She was on the verge of dry sobbing when she hugged me again.

Alice had disappeared and then reappeared.

"Come on! You never did finish Pretty Woman." She said, weaving her arm through mine and dragging me to the living room.

"Alice, I don't think I'll finish it this time either, It's two AM."

"I know you won't." She said, with a smug smile on her little face.

"Then what's the point?"

"You'll see later." She told me.

"Okay..." I trailed off as I went to the couch, I was already tired, even though I knew that Edward would come back any minute and leave it to me to ruin that moment, by being asleep.

Alice turned on pretty woman, where I had last fallen asleep. The last time. It was forty five minutes before I had fallen asleep.


	10. Chapter 10: The Hunt

**Chapter 8: The Hunt**

_"No man is demolished, but by himself."_

_Richard Bently_

**EPOV**

We were staying close to home to hunt. I had just come home to Bella, and I didn't want to go to far, or even leave in the first place- but she was right, I had to, I hadn't hunted for months. I had to leave before the scent became to much. I know I would never hurt hurt, but it had been so long since I had been around her, the scent was more powerful than usual, before I left, I could handle the blaze in my throat with ease. I knew I would never slip, but there is always the possibility. I need to stop hanging onto the negative. Think positive. Think positive. She forgave you, as soon as she knew that you were there, she jumps into your arms like nothing ever happened. I didn't deserve it.

I was also frustrated that my brothers did: forcibly removing me from my room. I need to hunt, but I want to go back to that house, full of the people I love.

We had just gotten out of the jeep. Jasper had been staring at me, and thinking of me the entire ride.

"Do you really want to hurt her. When you were with her, I felt your thirst. Your control was infinitesimally weaker than before you left, just by a tiny hair, but as we all know, that a wee bit of difference in control could easily kill her. Would you want that, Edward? Would you want to kill her at your own hand? How would you react to that, react to the fact that you couldn't spend a couple of hours away to keep the love of your existence."

"Jazz, you know that I would never hurt her." I told him.

"I know, but I was just trying to get you to actually hunt, you havea habit of being anxious without her while hunting and you'd make us go home sooner." Jasper told me, laying a hand on my shoulder.

"Jasper, I was able to stay away from her for months." I told him.

"Until I brought her back home." he told me.

"The thing is Jasper, her home is in Forks, with Charlie. How long has she been here?" I asked.

"She's been here since Sunday and Charlie gave her until Wednesday." He told me. "And Edward don't start this 'I'm not good for her crap' if you left ever leave her again, who knows what she'd do, and the fact that you came back tells you that you _cannot _stay away."

Emmett had already been away for about fifteen minutes. He came back to the Jeep, covered in blood. Claw marks in his shirt. I saw through his mind that he had played with a bear.

"Are you guys gonna eat, or bask in your fluffy bromance?" He asked us.

"Brother?" Jasper asked, gesturing for me to lead the way. We caught the scent of a herd of deer, but Emmett went the opposite direction, looking for bears. Jasper took down a couple of deer while I took down five. I was full, I felt as though when I walked I could hear the blood sloshing in my stomach. I ran back to the Jeep, wanting to go back home and be with Bella while I wasn't so thirsty.

Jasper was not too far behind me and Emmett was no where to be seen.

"Emmett. Come on, let's go!" I called, he came running to the jeep a couple of minutes later. I was in no mood to wait.

_Gosh, Someone needs some cheering up! _He thought. "Are you sure you're ready?" He asked me. I just looked at him and rolled my eyes. "Okay, Mr. Bossy." He said as we all flashed into the jeep. And started the two hour journey home, we had been gone about 6 hours since two and we wouldn't be back until 10 AM, 9:30 at the earliest. nanosecond wouldn't be early enough. There was nothing more I wanted to go back to the house and grab Bella and wrap her in my arms and keep her there forever. Though I don't know how she was able to react as she did when I had first arrived home. She jumped into my arms, eagerly. Like she actually wanted me back. Though I have no idea on Earth why. I was the one to break her heart, to break us. It didn't feel right unless she was with me. Without her, I felt as though I was nothing. I felt as though I had been ripped to shreds, but there was pieces missing and that I would never be whole again.

"Edward, enough with the guilt! You don't have any reason to do this to yourself. You're here and she's here- so get over it!" Jasper told me. _Edward, if she didn't want you back, why would she allow herself to be taken to Alaska, by me of all people. I was after all, the one who made our absence in her life necessary, but I sought the opportunity to get you two back together, it was the only time where I've seen you genuinely happy. So Cheer up before I make you,_

He chuckled a loud. "What joke did I miss?" Emmett asked, frustrated that something funny wasn't revolved around him.

"Jasper told me to cheer up, before he made me." I said, staring out the window. Only 30 minutes left.

He roared with laughter, the frame of the Jeep was moving. "He got you with vampire humor, Edd-o" He said, while laughing. The rest of the ride was in a comfortable silence.

We came down our driveway and I immediately heard Esme._ Oh, the boys are home._ _I'll bet he feels so much better. I'm glad we didn't move Bella when she fell asleep. I'm sure he would want to be the one to do it. _We parked the jeep in the garage and as soon as I walked into the living I was attacked by Alice. She gripped me up in a tight hug and spun me around.

"Now I get to have a proper hello." She whispered and smiled.

"Hello to you to Alice," I said, kissing her cheek.

_I'm going to go with Jazz, talk to you later. _She said as she sprinted up the stairs.

Esme then grabbed me in one of her motherly hugs.

"It's so good to have you back son." She told me sincerely. Wen she let me go, she looked at Bella's sleeping form on the couch. She looked so peaceful sleeping. I went to the couch and carefully picked her up and took her to the bedroom and laid her on the bed. The scent was nothing now. The jeep still held a faint trace of her scent and I had just hunted, so a ripcord did not set my throat on fire. There was a slight burn, but one that was both easy and hard to ignore at the same time. Every minute that I spent with her, even before now, reminded me of her fraility. She hadn't woken up when I moved her to the bed in my room. I climbed in beside her and put my arms around her, just like I used to in Forks. Used to. Two words that I hated, but were true. She still didn't wake, but she talked clear as day.

"Edward. Don't leave. I love you." She slept talked.

"Bella, I will never leave you again," I vowed.

"You'd better not," Alice said softly as she walked in. "You don't know what she went through without you. I have been keeping it from you, the last thing you need is more self doubt and self-pity and whatever else is brewing in that irrational, overreacting head of yours, but I want you to see it..sometime. It's not a pretty sight." She whispered.

"I don't know how i'll earn her forgiveness." I told my favorite sister.

"It's not as hard as you think it will be, Trust me. Wait until she wakes."

(Cliffy, I know. =P Still loving the enthusiasm from this story, it means so much, sorry I am not updating as fast as I was before. We are starting our Senior Exit projects and its a butt-ton of research and writing on stuff that I don't really want to, and I have other stories I have been writing that are not Fanfic related, so thanks for hanging in there with me. Take an invisible cookie. Reviews/favorites/Alerts are always welcome. Til further a-due: PEACE OUT! o_O )


	11. Chapter 11: Awakening

_(A/n before we get started. A big warm thank you and shout out goes to NewTowngirl. She has reviewed pretty much ever chapter. And a thank you to EVERYONE~ Remember, I will not eat you, criticism/reviews and all that other Jazz is always welcome. Here we go, round #9.)_

_"Evil is powerless if the good are unafraid"_

_Ronald Reagan_

Chapter 9: Awakening 

**EPOV: **

Alice told me nothing, and thought nothing, of what was to come when Bella would awake. The only thing she thought of is why she couldn't sometimes see her. I had told Alice not to look, but that didn't mean that she couldn't see. In her thoughts, she told me that she had seen a few flashes of her, but after a couple of weeks, she saw nothing.

Everything felt right when she was in my arms. It felt like she belonged there. She didn't even stir in the night. She had not dreamt and no sleep talking was heard, so she was in a deep sleep. She starting stirring around 10 in the morning. She placed her head on my chest and inhaled deeply, her fingers clutching at my shirt. She would be awake any minute. About five minutes after that, her beautiful brown eyes fluttered open. In that moment. it felt as though if I had a heart, it would have shattered into a million pieces. The look on her face...I hadn't done anything to deserve it. Her warm eyes met mine as she grinned, ear to ear. I couldn't help but match hers, knowing that she was here and safe, but I imagined she wanted to talk out a few things from the start, but she didn't, she just threw her right arm over me and hugged her self tighter into my side. I kissed her on the head and inhaled her scent. We were silent for a few minutes, I could hear the family downstairs, talking and planning the way home, to Forks. Bella then suddenly sat up on the bed and grabbed a pillow and sat in her lap and held it.

"So what have you been up, until two days ago?" She asked me, looking down.

"Bella. I am so sorry." I told her, trying to get off the subject, even though I knew it would never happen.

"I know you are. It's not your fault, or mine, or Jasper's. It's no one's fault, and don't you dare make it yours." She told me, while I hung my head and stared at the comforter on the pull out bed. She sighed and reached out her hand to rest it against my cheek, and I brought my eyes up to meet hers. "I know why you left, and you're here which is the part that counts." She told me. I reached out and laid my hand on top of hers that was still resting against my cheek. I entwined my fingers with hers and brought her hand down with mine.

"To answer your question, I was just moping around. I had gone to South America, to avoid the thoughts of the family. I couldn't stand it. All they thought about was how much they missed you- missed us. They would think: She made him so happy. I hate to see him like this. It was the last thing I needed. I wanted so badly to stay, but knew I had to leave to keep you safe. Then Alice tells me that she couldn't see you for a point in time, Just because I told her not to look, doesn't mean she doesn't see." The only thing that would explain Alice's thoughts is that Bella had been on the reservation. And the line had come back, the genetic quirk that allowed the 'boys' in La Push to morph into large dogs. Werewolves, but more shape shifters. Bella had to have known. "So what did you do?"

"Well, I couldn't stand being alone. Charlie was about to throw me into a loony bin. He had Renee to come to Forks, to try to get me to come home to her, but I refused. I didn't want to move, to leave the place that had changed me forever. So, I remembered Jacob and went to go see him. He patched up the holes, but occasionally they would tear back open and I'd break down. There was a point where he wasn't there. He wouldn't answer my phone calls and then he came into my room, and tried to tell me why, but he couldn't. He reminded me of the story that he told me about the cold ones and I knew. I went to go see him the next day and I was proven right. Jake's a wolf. I kept having nightmares and replaying the scene in my head when you left, thinking I was never going to be enough. Enough to be able to deserve you. I mean, I am just human. I'm not the most beautiful girl in the world, I'm clumsy and awkward, I would bet that those aren't very desirable qualities." I tried to ignore the fact that she knew that her friend is a wolf, we would talk about it later.

I laughed and then sighed. "Bella, I had to force myself to leave you or I never would have, I told myself that I'd have to lie through my teeth for hours for you to believe, but you listened to the lie. Like there is someway I could exist without needing you." I told her, looking her in the eyes.

"So then how did you leave?" She asked me in a whisper.

"I just threw the Volvo into drive and floored it. I knew that if I didn't leave in that second, I never would. I told myself that you'd be better without me, and that I could force myself to stay away, but that was a battle I was losing. It was just a matter of time before I came back and begged for you to take me back until I got the call from Esme." I told her.

"So that was you." She said.

"Yes." I replied. As she laid back down and pulled me down with her and she curled into my side and rested her head on my chest. I heard Esme.

_Edward, If your listening, we're going to leave later this afternoon. We need to get Bella some breakfast, so bring her on down. Her breakfast almost ready. _

As if on cue, Her stomach growled.

"I don't feel like moving." Bella said, laughing.

"You don't have to." I said, throwing her into my arms and running into the kitchen. I ran her to the kitchen and sat her down in a chair at the dining table that we never used and sat down beside her. Esme brought her food to the table.

"Esme, you didn't have to got through all this trouble. I can cook." She told her as Esme set the steaming plate of eggs and bacon in front of her.

"I know dear. It's just that we wanted to get an early start to the morning." She replied.

"Oh. What For?" She asked.

"We're leaving later today, to go back to Forks." She said with a giant smile on her face, I couldn't help but to match it. I missed the foggy little town that had become home. Bella wasn't due back until the end of the week. I could hear drawers opening and closing while Bella was finishing up breakfast. I then stood up and reached out for her hand and she took it without a word and we headed up to start packing as well. It took us an hour or so to pack and then I took of the suitcases to the car and we all met on the driveway where all the cars were.

"Alright, let's all have a safe trip home. We have each other's cells in case of emergency. Let's get on the road." Carlisle announced as he and Esme, got into the Mercedes and took off. Rose and Emmett weren't that far behind in the M3 and Alice and Jasper went after that in the Jeep. I just looked at Bella.

"Are you ready?" I asked her.

"What kind if question is that?" she asked me rhetorically as he just laughed.

"Let's go," I said, while I opened my door for her and I suddenly reappeared before she even had my seatbelt on. I started the Volvo and peeled out of the driveway, pointing us in the direction of home.


	12. Chapter 12: Home

"What is right is often forgotten by what is convenient."

Bodie Thoene

Chapter ten: Home

**Ed POV: **

We were close to home, I imagine that the rest of the family was already there, It was a long journey and so I stopped every few hours so Bella could get out and stretch her legs. It was normally a two-day drive, but Of course _my _trip would be a whole lot faster than that. Bella was in the car with me, and I wanted to keep my time with her to a maximum, before I took her back to Charlie's where he would blame me for whatever happened when I left. I still didn't know how Bella was. I was telling myself that I didn't necessarily want to know. Who knows what happened? I certainly did not and I doubt that Bella would tell me. Maybe Victoria was back? Maybe the wolves have been dealing with her in our absence, who knows. Bella was resting her head on my shoulder and had drifted asleep, we pulled up into the driveway and I picked up her up and placed her on the couch in the living while the rest of us were putting things back where they belong. Esme was humming in her mind and thinking about how nice it felt to be home again, to be whole again. Bella was due back in two days, but we figured that we'd brown nose Charlie a little. We were going to finish unpacking later tonight, while Alice and Jasper took Bella back home. Bella was still asleep on the couch.

"Might as well go ahead and wake her up." Alice whispered to me.

"Alright." I said, going to the couch and kneeling in front of it. I stroked Bella's cheek and she immediately responded to my touch, stirring.

"Bella." I said softly. "Bella, love. Time to wake up." I said, stroking her cheek again.

"Huh?" She groaned as she stretched. "What's going on?"

"Just time to take you home. Alice and Jasper are going to take you and I'll follow them there."

"Okay. Let me go get my bags." She said through a yawn. As soon as she had both feet on the ground, she lost her balance and I caught her.

"Alice and Jasper already got them." I told her. I then carried her to the garage where Jasper and Alice were waiting.

I set her down at the car and opened the door for her as she got in. Jasper started the engine and they took off and I went right after them. I was almost to the house when I caught a familiar scent. It was an unpleasant one. I heard rustling and followed it. I then heard their thoughts.

_Jake, come on. We're on their land. They're supposed to be back and we're not supposed to be here. Come on! Too late, I smell. Him. Them, whoever it is. _

_ Just relax, Quil. He won't attack us. _

What made the kid sound so sure, i didn't know? I ran to them and they growled at me.

_Going to go behind that tree to phase. _

I nodded. He came back in only a pair of blue jean cut off shorts.

"What are you doing here?" He asked me, in a disgusted tone.

"I could ask you the same question."

"Well we had to take care of your problems."

"_My _Problems?"

"Yeah the leech, and his red headed friend, they were stalking Bella so we did what needed to be done."

"Needed to be done?"

"Yeah, as in killed, for want of a better word. You can't kill something that's already dead."

This kid was getting on my nerves; he knew that I was almost ready to attack him so he thought of something that would make me NOT want to do that. He was thinking of Bella, what she was like. How Sam had passed the memory of how she was when I turned my back on her in the woods. I couldn't help but cringe.

He was laughing internally. _Told you he wouldn't attack us. _He had a big grin on his face and phased back and the two ran back towards the line. I ran back towards Bella's house and climbed in her window, and waited.

**ALICE: **

Bella was kind of quiet on the ride to her house. I don't know about her, but I'm thrilled to be back home. I saw Edward climb through Bella's window.

"He's waiting for you in your room." I told her, while looking at her in the rearview mirror.

She kind of smiled and looked stressed as we turned into her drive.

"Bella, it's going to be okay, he's not that angry." Jasper said, probably sensing her stress.

"THAT angry?"

"Jazz, A little help?" I asked of my talented hubby.

"OK, he should be more relieved than anything now. I'll wait here."

Bella and I got out of the car and I knocked on the door. Charlie quickly answered and immediately took Bella into his arms.

"So glad to see you, Bells! I've been worried sick." Charlie said as he led her in the house and I followed carrying her bag and took it upstairs to her room. I just smiled at Edward pacing in her room and quietly laughed and he hissed at me. I just laughed again as he went back to pacing.

"Alice, did you see anything of the red head? The one from the baseball game?" He asked me suddenly. I was unpacking Bella's clean clothes from her bag so I had a reasonable excuse to be up here for so long. I could hear Charlie and Bella talking downstairs, just small talk.

"No, why?" I asked, skeptical.

"Apparently She and Laurent were stalking Bella while we were gone and the dogs took care of it."

"WHAT?" I whispered angrily.

"Yeah, the mutts are back. But we owe them." He told me, looking me dead in the eyes.

"We'll have to tell Carlisle. He has to know as soon as possible." I replied as I finished unpacking at vampire speed and went back downstairs.

"Bella, your bags are unpacked." I told her.

"Thanks Alice."

"Yes, thank you Alice, thanks for bringing her back." Charlie said to me as he hugged me.

"Well, I have to go. Gotta help Esme get us back in order."

"You guys are moving back?"

"Yes, Esme found LA not at all to her liking." I lied smoothly "And Bella is here."

"Is _he _coming back?" Charlie said, with a red face, immediately turning serious.

"I think so." I said, mentally smiling.

He looked at Bella. "I want you to stay away from him, Bella. He's no good for you."

"Fine."

Voices were raising. I found this as my time to leave. I got back to the car with Jasper and we went back home.

**Edward POV: **

Bella and Charlie were fighting over me. I broke my non-beating heart to hear her defending me. After everything I've done to her she is still willing to risk everything she has...for me. I heard her plow up the steps and took my place in the rocking chair in the corner and I stood up when her door flew open and she ran right into my arms. She hugged me tightly and I gently pulled her closer. She began to cry and I patted her back.

"It's all okay. Bella, look at me." She did so. "Everything is going to be okay." I told her, looking her in the eye and knowing it was true. Nothing was coming for us anymore. We move on, something I desperately wanted to do. Bella pulled back and smiled at me and I kissed her.


End file.
